Life is so much better after having sex.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
