Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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