is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
