I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
