I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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