I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
