She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
