at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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