Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
