I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
