So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
