I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
