'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
They should really pass out barf bags in church
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Randomize