Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
