I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize
