So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize
