I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
