i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Randomize
