Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Randomize
