come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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