discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
