my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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