also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
he fucked my hip out of place.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
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