No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Randomize
