You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Randomize
