Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
