jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
