I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Randomize
