How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
