i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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