i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
