When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
