I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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