I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
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