I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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