2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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