O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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