cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
