Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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