Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
