I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
