i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
my mouth tastes like poor choices
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Randomize
