okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I'd cum for enchiladas.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Damn victory sex feels great
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
