i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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