: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I am naked and annoyed.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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