I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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