I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
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