she is the kim kardashian of front butts
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
i think im in europe. pls send help
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