you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
