sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
